Day 5: Choose life, what does that mean? I’m already living.

Choose life, what does that mean? I’m already living.

It means..

When you wake up in the morning, get up even when you dont want too.

When you have a bad day, have a positive thought and try to smile again.

When you have the choice to do something kind for someone else, do it.

When you have the chance to sit at home, go see your family.

When you have you’re kids and husband in front of you, put down your phone ask them about their day. And actively listen.

When you have the moment, say thank you.

When you have a goal, work toward it.

When you have someone one hugging you, squeeze tight.

When you have beauty in front of you,soak it in.

When you choose life, choose what is good, choose what will make this world better, kinder, and full of light,love, and happiness.

Live your life good

Live your life happy

Live your life with value

Now it’s your turn. Fill in the blank

When you have __________ , __________.

Day 2: What’s On My Mind And Heart Today? My Papaw

A lot of you don’t know why I’ve been so quiet. It’s because I’ve lost to many in a year. And I feel lost without those close relationships. One of the closest jut happened…

September 8th my mom called me while I was at work. I didn’t answer of course, my boss pays me to work at work.

I had my grandpa on my mind. Maybe I should have him come in for a meal, at least I would know he would eat…I didn’t text him.

Later on a customer bought a left over Turkey tag.

“Hey, I thought, I’ll buy one too and then I can go snag Papaw and take him on a ride with me.” And I did.

I got off of work that evening and called my mom back.

“Have you heard from Papaw?” She asked

“No, I am going to be going there tomorrow.” I had plans to take him out and get some of his shopping needs taken care of.

“Can you check on him? He hasn’t been answering my calls it goes straight to voice mail.”

So I drove over to his house, walked in and found my Papaw on the floor.

Thinking he had fell I rushed over ready to make a joke about it and help him up.

When I touched his shoulder it was cold, then I noticed his blue color.

My papaw was one of my best friends. He always showed up. I don’t get much company, my Papaw was my company.

People just don’t visit. My papaw did.

He was the one I walked to about hunting, my confusions, our family, old times, good old shows, the weather, just about anything.

With papaw you didn’t expect any drama to come from anything you said to him.

He always showed up. To my cheerleading events, my tonsils being taken, when I had my baby girl, birthday parties if I had them.

My grandfather on my Dad’s side died last year. Around the same time of year, my Papaw as soon as I got home, came asking “Are you alright girl?”.

Papaw is the one who introduced me to my live of the outdoors. He would always take us fishing, then take to get a big banana split. Nancy town, in Georgia was one of our regular spot to go to.

I miss him, it’s so hard. I’ve not been in the mood to go hunt really, I just think, if I do get something..who will I tell that would actually care and be proud?

My papaw has always cheered me on, just a month ago when I told him I was going for my Personal Trainer certification, he said “Don’t forget about me when you become a millionar.”

I won’t ever forget my Papaw.

I planted tomatoes for him, he loved tomatoes. I took and ripped those plants up, no point in growing somethimy no one else would eat. They was for my papaw. The last time I saw him in person I took him a bag,he had a hard time eating them, but he was happy.

He would set his mind to something and just do it. He would say “It’s all in your head.” “Mind of matter, if you dont mind it don’t matter.”

If someone needed something, he would just do it, if he could.

If he wanted something, he would do it, so he gained his Masters degree.

I don’t know, I just want to get in the car and go visit him.

My mom asked me to write his obituary, I wrote a little something at the end.
Tall and gruff the big bear seemed, but he was as gentle as can be. A big man with eyes filled with wonder and joy. He made the world smile and the leaves waved good bye, as he walked towards a new adventure filled with an everlasting love.

The leaves waved good bye…

The 7th is when they suspect my Papaw passing.

I was out at camp with my husband, I didn’t feel right and I couldn’t tell you why. My husband’s noticed and asked.

I remember looking at a maple tree it’s leaves had turned red and was shaking in the wind, that line popped up in my head..what I was going to use it for I didn’t know, until..my momma asked me to write his obituary.

Because of the feeling I had that day, and the thoughts I had that Sunday at work, and the feelings I felt the moment I found him.

I have no doubt my God is real, angels are real, and my Papaw still looks down on me from heaven.

I just wish I could hug him. And listen to him fuss at me for dying my hair, bacause I know he would.

So, depressing it may be, all that’s on my mind is my Papaw. No one wants me to talk about him because it depressed them.

I just want to share his life with others, he isn’t forgotten.

He taught me and others around him so much. And made so many laugh.

I hope you remember when someone is sharing something about a loved one that’s no longer here, listen and soak in that story.

That story is how their memory isn’t forgotten. No one wants to be forgotten.

Bless you Babies

Bless you babies and the love you bring.

Lift your weeping head and close your eyes, listen to the song birds sing to each other the song of life.

Lessons of love and kindness are all around. You have the right to wear the crown.

The crown of happiness is not far to find, just look up and praise the maker if the sun and sky.

Bless you babies and the love you bring.

Breath in the air and let it caress the miracle string in which you sing. Realize you are the reason for someone smiling.

Gather up all that is good and make for yourself a new pair of glasses. People are ugly, but what you may see in the world is what leaves many in awe.

Bless you babies and the love you bring

Go sit in the sunshine and feel the hug of the sun and the kiss of the breeze.

Mountains are hard to climb, but remember big things are meant to be conquered.

Feeling small is a strength of humility you own and others lack. Shine bright with that fact.

Bless you babies and the love you bring.

Open your eyes and watch the dandelion dance in the wind. Small is the seed that travels so far and plants it’s beauty in the yard of many. Some mistake it as weed. While others recognize the strength of the healer.

Bless you babies and love you bring.

I hope know how loved you are. I know right now things are hard. I want the pain you feel to be taken.

Stranger you may be, but my heart and arms are wide open with nothing that is meant to harm you.

I want you to know how perfect you are. Please don’t take life for granted. Bless you babies and the life you bring.

I’m sick Poem

Many of you know,I no longer practice the Jewish religion, but recent events in Pittsburgh still stings my heart. I’ve been crying over it.

Friends have been lost because of all this useless hate we have in the world. I wish so much, I could take it all away.

Growing up as Jew I suffered a lot of antisemitism in all shapes and sizes.

My sister and I one day was walking to the perk to get a donut in the orthodox Jewish community in Milwaukee WI. Out of no where shots was fired at us along with harsh words. We were okay, but frightened. We ran back to our house and told our parents what had happened. I was 10.

This was the first time I had ever been hit in the face with how someone could be so cruel, just because I was not 100% like them.

After this many other things occurred, over,and over again.

My out was writing my feelings all in poetry.
This poem was written in frustration and pain that had all built up at the age of 19. I just wanted to share it with you.

Click link below for poem:

https://poets.media/i-m-sick-1

#standagainsthate #loveoneanother #Istandagainstantisemism #loveyourneighbor #poem #inmemoryofthosewehavelost

You Can Live On A Lot Less

Sitting in the living room of my Great Aunt Edna had me at peace in the middle of the emotional roller coaster I had been on.

It was familiar, I spent so much time doing the exact same things I was watching my daughter do. Everything had changed, but nothing had changed.

My favorite scent of wet paper towel and wood smoke with the hint of just pure cleaness still lingered. The recliner I had fought to sit in so many times still sat in it’s same ole’ spot.

It was my second home in a way. I guess many others in my family and, well anyone who had ever been to my Aunts had the same feelings when they stepped in her door way.

That is just my Aunt Edna, she always makes you feel warm,welcomed,and loved.

I admire her in so many ways and sitting in that living room with her was worth more than any gold or rubbies.

This visit had a lot of meaning though. I could tell my Aunt had a lot to say to me.

“You can live on a lot less Tashanna.” She says to me kind of out of the blue.

“Oh I know Aunt Edna I don’t have a lot of things people say they need…”

I say continuing to tell her about how I don’t have anything but antenna for TV or internet like most young folks and I budget everything.

She shakes her head

” No, what I mean shanny is… ” Shanny has always been a nick name only belonging to myself and my cousin Shannon.

She continued to tell me this story.

There was some folks that lived in a shack. They grew up working for everything they had. Dusk to dawn. They didn’t know what money really was.

They lived in a little shack, they’re counter was made of old vanilla waffer boxes and plaster. And that is what they had for a kitchen counters.

They had a refrigerator, but they didn’t have electricity, or know that they needed to plug it in. My cousin brought them canned biscuits one day and she just sat them on the counter.

The lady told my cousin when she came back they just went “poof”. That’s how little they knew about the modern-day world.

My cousin visited them up until they passed away, she was good and befriended them . A young person would have thought them to be strange. But they were happy, and they were normal, just hadn’t known anything outside of that they grew up doing to get by.

“That’s what I mean by people can live with less than what they think. My Aunt finished saying.

I finally got what my Aunt was telling me.

I needed to humble myself and would be happier if I stopped chasing material things and just loved what God had blessed me with.

Life And It’s Changes

I’ve been silent for a while. I know some of you are wondering what happened and some of you know.

July was very hard, my Grandfather was diagnosed with a fast acting pancreatic cancer. As soon as I heard the news I was axious to go home to Georgia and just be with him.

I didn’t know how, seeing how every flight had been around 1,000 dollars. I had my daughter to think about, and who I couldn’t leave behind. My husband couldn’t leave his job without losing it. Emotions were everywhere.

That’s when God stepped in.

My older sister who lives in a different state calls me up. She found a flight that aligned with hers to Chattanooga Tennessee, it was only $632 for my daughter and I, but I had to leave the next day, find someone to bring me to the airport or pick my vehicle up for me.

Again God stepped in

Our friend Nathan showed up to help out offering to pick our vehicle up.

We arrived down to Georgia and the instant familiar mountains, curves, and humidity hugged me, bringing on a comfort I had not felt in a long time.

The next day we went straight to my grandfathers house, the house that grew me. The place I learned a lot about hard work and being greatful for what you have.

Not a inch of the house, the property went without some story from my childhood.

My grandfather had been pestured so many times to cut open a chestnut ๐ŸŒฐwhere the big chestnut tree use to stand tall.

Neighbored by the trailor where he stayed when we lived in his house.

I use to wait for him in the driveway. He would get off of working at the old Clakesville Mill, wearing his overhalls and caring his blue lunch pail.

My sister and I would play in the sand waiting until then, then go around the back of his trailor. He always had a Moonpie ๐ŸŒ› waiting.

I liked the chocolate ones of course. My sister Brenda would go and pet his leapord . We would sit and talk to him and Betty, she was his girlfriend.

They would ask us about school, and have us read something. Making us feel so smart, and specifial.

Then he would get his auto harps out and play for us. He let us us play with one of his older ones. We would play and sing old hyms like “I’ll Fly Away”

All these memories and going into the house knowing this was the end in this world, put a huge weight on my chest. It was so hard to bare.

My Aunt Teresa was their,she embraced us with a warm hug.

she has always been so beautiful, kind, gentle, and dear to me…my hear sank with how much all of this showed on her.

Brenda and I opened the old screen door that my daddy had built so many years ago and momma painted white with blue trim. It was still marked with the hole we put in it.

My paw was sitting in his recliner, I was half expecting the usual laughter of joy that always had greated us. It wasn’t there. He was just laying there trying hard to keep his eyes open.

This was the very first time he got to meet my sweet little girl, who’s presents helped everyone in the room at that moment.

I went over and kissed his cheek after my sister. He wanted to hold Casidy, being in a strange place she of course didn’t go, but sat studying him while eating her cheese it’s.

Paw finally getting up energy to talk said “I recon’ I’ll be going to meet the good Lord soon. ” Then continued into prayer thanking God for bringing us to be with him.

My heart broke even more, reality was setting in, my Paw had the same look many of the residents I had cared for as a CNA had in their last day, it upset me .

Though we all know one day we will be their and our loved ones too, I still had never thought to see that look on one of MY loved ones.

Paw finished praying, I went over to attempted getting Casidy to hug him singing “I love you, a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck, and a hug around the neck. ” it worked she hugged him and giggled about it too, proceeding to “tickle tickle” Paw.

Paw laughed, and said “I love you. ”

And for the first time ever my little girl said those three words clear as day “I love you. ”

The rest of the time we sat and watched him sleep, and when he woke up with a bit of strength Paw just repeated over and over looking us all straight in the eye “I love you. ” those words with his voice are the greatest gift my Paw has ever given me. I hope it stays with me for ever.

This world has all of us young folks so busy and with big eyes for the shiny things in life and selfishness, that we are forgetting what is really important.

I’m guilty of it…

During my visit my Cousin Forest who is older told me a story about a time he, my grandfather, and great grandpaw Bryson. He ended it with telling me “We had nothing, no vehicles just horse and buggy, no computers, no phones likes today, just each other and love. We made time for each other and spent life with each other, nothing means more then that.”

Now, we have phones that don’t have a conversation going with the neighbors listening but we don’t call.

We have vehicles, but don’t visit

We have computers, but don’t even take the time to send a message.

Life is changing, and my visit with the old timers in my family really woke me up more than ever.

I need to change, we all do, we all need to learn to love again and what that means.

But thats just this redheads opinion.

Have a great week y’all

One of the last pictures I have with mu Grandfather taken in 2011, I was 17.

I miss him

Hard Work & Family Time

When you mix our kind of work with a little time for your friends and family time you are bound for a little adventure.

These past two weeks have been absolutely packed full and busy. So I am going to just give you the highlights of the Memorial day weekend and week. ๐Ÿ™‚

Saturday we got up early, it’s the time of the year we have to start the process of cutting, splitting, hauling, and stacking, wood.

We headed out to the family camp to do exactly that.

With my daughter in one arm I threw wood in the bed if the truck while my husband split it.

It wasn’t to much longer when my father inlaw and our great uncle showed up. They took over for me.

So Casidy and I went on our own adventure.

When it was all said and done, we headed in.

That night we had our friends over for a little cook out. It was a good time as always up until they decided to get funny.

My sister in law and I was in the kitchen talking to the other ladies when her husband calls us.

“Sara, shanna, come look at this! ” he calls.

Well, assuming one of our husbands wad probably doing something hilariously stupid we walked towards my back screen door.

The guys had a Pine snake ๐Ÿ caught in a tub.

I grabbed my daughter and ran back through the house with my sister inlaw behind me. Both of us screaming.

She yells, ” Get in the car! Get in my car! ” no questions asked I got into the passengers side of the car.

With our driveway being so muddy from the rain Sara slides on her ass falling.

She gets in, turns the car on.

Here those pains in our butts come with the snake, Sara puts the car in reverse and there we were ready to go.

I yell out the window “kill it! ”

One yells back “No, we can’t. ”

I yell back “I don’t give a shit kill the damn thing”

Getting the hint the guys finally got into my friends car and took the snake off down the road.

I’m still pissed they didn’t kill it, watch it come right back.

See, when you grow up down south with poisonous snakes like this copperhead that bit my friends son over the weekend-who is thank God alright๐Ÿ, you do not make friends. I hate them.

Sunday came along, we ended up fixing a belt on our car and that evening I finally got my garden in.

Monday I spent my time with my family. My parents, nephews, grandfather,and friends came for another cook out.

It was nice, we ate good food like my friends yummy chickpea salad recipe, which I will ask her if I can share with y’all.

Tuesday, I did mor gardening. and something pretty awesome happened

This women right here, ran.

It was freaking hot in the house, so I decided after my workout and a little gardening I was going to put casidy in the stroller and walk to my mother in laws for dinnner.

The walk turned into me running 1/4 of a mile.
Guys, this is huge for me! Why? I havent ran without having an “episode” from my superventricular tachiacaria in years. This is a condition that caused my heart will beat to fast. I usually A. Lose vision or B . Faint while feeling dizzy like and overwhelmingly hot.

It’s been 4 years and today I really think I can get back to 5 miles a day. I have to thank beachbody for teaching me how to eat properly/drink water consistently and all the motivation I have to exercise everyday from my team and being a coach. Not only has it helped that condition, but my RA so much.

Wednesday I went over to my mother-in -laws so she could show me how to cook with a preserve ruhbarb.

I got 3 freezerbags and a cake out of it along with an education of how to work with this northern plant.

It is perfect ๐Ÿ‘Œ for summer eatin alone, but that cake, boy was it ever a comfort food fit for winter. And as you can see, it is to tasty to wait for a picture.

Get the recipe here.

Well, that is all I have for you today folks.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend, be sure yo check out other sections of our website and follow us on social media.

-Tashanna