Life And It’s Changes

I’ve been silent for a while. I know some of you are wondering what happened and some of you know.

July was very hard, my Grandfather was diagnosed with a fast acting pancreatic cancer. As soon as I heard the news I was axious to go home to Georgia and just be with him.

I didn’t know how, seeing how every flight had been around 1,000 dollars. I had my daughter to think about, and who I couldn’t leave behind. My husband couldn’t leave his job without losing it. Emotions were everywhere.

That’s when God stepped in.

My older sister who lives in a different state calls me up. She found a flight that aligned with hers to Chattanooga Tennessee, it was only $632 for my daughter and I, but I had to leave the next day, find someone to bring me to the airport or pick my vehicle up for me.

Again God stepped in

Our friend Nathan showed up to help out offering to pick our vehicle up.

We arrived down to Georgia and the instant familiar mountains, curves, and humidity hugged me, bringing on a comfort I had not felt in a long time.

The next day we went straight to my grandfathers house, the house that grew me. The place I learned a lot about hard work and being greatful for what you have.

Not a inch of the house, the property went without some story from my childhood.

My grandfather had been pestured so many times to cut open a chestnut 🌰where the big chestnut tree use to stand tall.

Neighbored by the trailor where he stayed when we lived in his house.

I use to wait for him in the driveway. He would get off of working at the old Clakesville Mill, wearing his overhalls and caring his blue lunch pail.

My sister and I would play in the sand waiting until then, then go around the back of his trailor. He always had a Moonpie 🌛 waiting.

I liked the chocolate ones of course. My sister Brenda would go and pet his leapord . We would sit and talk to him and Betty, she was his girlfriend.

They would ask us about school, and have us read something. Making us feel so smart, and specifial.

Then he would get his auto harps out and play for us. He let us us play with one of his older ones. We would play and sing old hyms like “I’ll Fly Away”

All these memories and going into the house knowing this was the end in this world, put a huge weight on my chest. It was so hard to bare.

My Aunt Teresa was their,she embraced us with a warm hug.

she has always been so beautiful, kind, gentle, and dear to me…my hear sank with how much all of this showed on her.

Brenda and I opened the old screen door that my daddy had built so many years ago and momma painted white with blue trim. It was still marked with the hole we put in it.

My paw was sitting in his recliner, I was half expecting the usual laughter of joy that always had greated us. It wasn’t there. He was just laying there trying hard to keep his eyes open.

This was the very first time he got to meet my sweet little girl, who’s presents helped everyone in the room at that moment.

I went over and kissed his cheek after my sister. He wanted to hold Casidy, being in a strange place she of course didn’t go, but sat studying him while eating her cheese it’s.

Paw finally getting up energy to talk said “I recon’ I’ll be going to meet the good Lord soon. ” Then continued into prayer thanking God for bringing us to be with him.

My heart broke even more, reality was setting in, my Paw had the same look many of the residents I had cared for as a CNA had in their last day, it upset me .

Though we all know one day we will be their and our loved ones too, I still had never thought to see that look on one of MY loved ones.

Paw finished praying, I went over to attempted getting Casidy to hug him singing “I love you, a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck, and a hug around the neck. ” it worked she hugged him and giggled about it too, proceeding to “tickle tickle” Paw.

Paw laughed, and said “I love you. ”

And for the first time ever my little girl said those three words clear as day “I love you. ”

The rest of the time we sat and watched him sleep, and when he woke up with a bit of strength Paw just repeated over and over looking us all straight in the eye “I love you. ” those words with his voice are the greatest gift my Paw has ever given me. I hope it stays with me for ever.

This world has all of us young folks so busy and with big eyes for the shiny things in life and selfishness, that we are forgetting what is really important.

I’m guilty of it…

During my visit my Cousin Forest who is older told me a story about a time he, my grandfather, and great grandpaw Bryson. He ended it with telling me “We had nothing, no vehicles just horse and buggy, no computers, no phones likes today, just each other and love. We made time for each other and spent life with each other, nothing means more then that.”

Now, we have phones that don’t have a conversation going with the neighbors listening but we don’t call.

We have vehicles, but don’t visit

We have computers, but don’t even take the time to send a message.

Life is changing, and my visit with the old timers in my family really woke me up more than ever.

I need to change, we all do, we all need to learn to love again and what that means.

But thats just this redheads opinion.

Have a great week y’all

One of the last pictures I have with mu Grandfather taken in 2011, I was 17.

I miss him

A Redheads Thoughts On All This Gun Control Talk.

This is a big conversation, but it is one that needs to be had. Some are going to disagree and probably even think I’m a nut. Who cares…

Kids are walking out of schools, everyone has their guards up and minds closed, and every other day I’m seeing another school investigating threats made by children not taking what is going on seriously.

It’s aggravating. It’s frustrating. It’s heart wrenching.

What you have is a generation who are expected to be adults to soon. A generation who is scared. A generation who doesn’t know how to handle a emotion. So of course they are going to do some of this.

We need to listen to our younger generations, but also take into account they are acting out of fear. They are being influenced by what they are seeing in the media without fully understanding it.

And really, so are adults. I can say this for a fact based off of things I’ve seen reposted on social media that isn’t being fact checked.

Like you may have ran into the post that says something along the lines of “All Israel has teachers with concealed weapons in every school…..”

I know this isn’t true because I lived there. I picked my nephew up from his Gahn (school) , where not one teacher was armed. Why? It was against the religious views of the school… And if you know anything about Israel, religion plays a huge role in everyday life.

I could go on about how I know just that post is junk..

Also, as I said I lived in Israel. I remember a bombing happened and my friend just happened to be in the barracks that it happened in. It came from across the border they hit their power supply. Next thing I know I’m hearing Israel bombed the neighboring countries power supply from US news station..checked other news sources some agreed others had their facts straight.

My point is, no one fact checks. They listen to the “he said, she said” of the media and believe it. Or, there is not having any educational background on the topic at all. All this causes a fiasco.

And here we are, talking about the latest fiasco. Gun control.

Guns being taken away, regulated, what ever isn’t going to stop the violence. Just look, we have stabbings happening too.

There is something going on here that is beyond guns. It’s a mental health issue possibly? Or is there something that as a society we aren’t doing?

It doesn’t matter the weapon they are using… these people are acting out against innocent people and finding the root cause I think is where we need to go.

And though we may not know now, maybe to start change we need shut up a minute with the arguing and start behind our own doors.

A few steps maybe we take as parents

1. Cutting back on technology

Put your damn phone down, turn off your TV, put up the game console, put aside your tablets, laptops, and computers.

Have a conversation, get outside, learn how to live without it so it isn’t a necessity.

2. Teach your child how to handle their emotion. How to problem solve…and if your having problems with it yourself, take the classes…watch old Mr.Rogers shows maybe a little Daniel Tiger.

3. Teach your child how to reach out and be kind to the lonely kid in the corner, and if they are the lonely kid in the corner..how to go make a friend .

4. Teach them how to be safe with and around a gun, YUP I said it.

5. Teach them how to earn what they have and be thankful for what they have. Big or small.

6. Teach them to love themselves the way they are and not how society expects them to be. To think on their own and stand on their own.

I’m obviously for having a gun if you haven’t gathered by now. I am a women who hunts to put food on the table and a person who believes I should have the right to protect myself.

But I am also for having a safer future for my daughter. These things are not what I want her to grow up seeing as the norm.

Maybe I’m crazy. But I was taught to stand for something, or you’ll fall for anything. And I stand for the right to bear arms. I stand for being an American.

A Drink With A Little Fire

I enjoy the small things in life. Today was a nice day to do that..

This evening we kept things pretty simple for a Friday. I had one of my occasional drinks with my dinner and then we headed outside and did a little spring cleaning.

My husband gathered up some scrap wood and started a fire in our fire pit. Then helped a friend of ours put a new exhaust on his motorcycle. I cleaned up my box I usually plant my tomatoes in, then took a walk outback to scope out a place where we could maybe put a play area for Casidy.

As I was outside I took a moment and just breathed in the crisp air. My mind became clear, my body relaxed.

And I just observed my surrounding. Little tracks from the squirrels sat in the snow. The trees still and tall. It was nice…

I like days like this when we kick all of that garbage aside. Put our phones away and enjoy the company of our friends..I think maybe things haven’t completely gone to crap.

It seems these days all you hear when you go out is politics. Everything’s become politics. Its worrisome.

I think we all need more time away from everything media and more time visiting..

Gosh what I’d give to have some of the things our parents have. I wish I had random company stop in just to say hello and do a little front porch sitting.

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The Outdoors,Me,And God

I lived in the bible belt. Yep, I’m a little Georgia peach who married a Yooper who now lives in the U.P. of Michigan.

I have Southern Baptist, Baptist, Nazarenes, Apostolic Pentecostals, Lutheran, Catholic and even those who practice the Jewish faith in my family.

Everyone in my family hangs on to God. They are doing their best to live life the way they see is the right way.

So, as you can imagine, I often get asked what I believe. I have those lovingly telling me how I should live and raise my daughter.

I am so blessed to have such a loving family that they all are so concerned about my soul. Once upon a time I would have gotten offended.. I know out of love they just want to make sure I’m going to heaven. I’ve been through a gravely road when it comes to my ‘religious’ beliefs.

Now though, I take a deep breath. I try to be understanding. Now, I don’t really comment on the topic, because I believe 100% it’s between me and God.

But… I guess….I am going to share a thought on the topic with you.

Let’s start with saying I don’t go to church. I go out in the woods or down by the water. All of that noise of questioning disappears. There is silence. There is piece.

Just being is probably my favorite part of being outdoors. I don’t have to worry about being judge. I feel closer to God and that is where we have our deepest conversations.

I’ve been asked many times “Aren’t you afraid of the bears,wolves,cats?”. No, I’m not. I usually have a gun on me, my husband and I do hunt together a lot of the times, and most importantly I know God is there protecting me.

Sometimes, I look at the beauty that surrounds me and I am just speechless. I thank God, I compliment him even, and I think what a wonderful gift it is to be allowed to enjoy the great outdoors.

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